Thursday, June 3, 2010

Looking forward

Countdown: 1 week, 3 days. Toothpaste? Check. Soap? Check. More disinfectant and hand sanitizer than I could ever use in 8 weeks? Check.

I thought it might be a good idea to start this whole thing with some thoughts on how I'm feeling looking forward to this crazy adventure to Uganda.

First of all, it's really crazy to think that we've been thinking about this trip and planning it for something like a year and a half. I had heard stories of Uganda, looked at mission organizations websites, watched the Invisible Children movie, seen pictures of the death and starvation, and for some reason my heart almost exploded when I thought about the opportunity to serve there. Looking that far ahead, I really had no concept of what it would be like to actually prepare myself to leave, raise support, or realize I am leaving my comfortable life for 8 weeks.

I think that back then, I just wanted something to shake me out of my comfort zone and force me to face the realities of a world I know next to nothing about. I have always fallen in to the temptation to become content and simply blend in to the world around me. I've been praying that God would use this opportunity to help me see Him in a different way. I want to ask hard questions about the culture I live in and the ways it has affected my understanding of God and humanity, and I want to see and understand the way my brothers and sisters in a very different culture understand and relate to our Father. Needless to say, in looking far ahead, I was thinking mostly about myself (that's certainly never happened before ;) ) and the ways that God and I could grow together through this kind of experience.

A big shift that's happened over the past couple months is the fact that I have much more of a burden for the people of Uganda to know the Gospel by the grace God working through me while I'm there. I know that sounds pretty elementary, and I could easily say that that's been my desire all along. But in reality, I'm actually starting feel the burden for real now. I'm so excited to meet my brothers and sisters and make new relationships where God will be glorified and the love of Jesus Christ can be shared. I want to love them even before I meet them, and keep their eternity, not just mine, in the forefront of my heart and mind.

On top of the changes in my heart and motives, I'm also starting to be a bit more apprehensive about leaving my family and fiance for that long. Granted, when I made these plans to take an 8 week trip there was no Shawn Woods in the picture. But now that there is a Shawn (and aren't we all so pumped that there is? :D), I'm really excited as to the ways this trip can help us to grow together as well. I've never been away from my family for that long either, which is kind of intimidating. I'm sure that this whole experience will give me an opportunity to trust God for my security and fulfillment without those close relationships around me constantly.

Praise God for a challenge, right?


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